Monday, July 04, 2016

Puns

The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.  He acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

She was only a whisky-maker, but he loved her still.

A rubber-band pistol was confiscated from a geometry class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

No matter how far you push the envelope, it will still be stationary.

A dog ave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

A hole has been found in the nudist-camp wall. The police are looking into it.

I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly, it sank proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure? The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."


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